blaboonI went to a green “fair” where booths were set up to educate and inform people about the many, many aspects of going green.  Unfortunately, attendance was mediocre, but it was hoped that I would spot some new creatures in the Green Jungle.

While picking up a brochure on the latest deal to install solar panels, I became engaged in a conversation with a new creature that I knew required documentation and entry into the catalog of species in the Green Jungle.  First, let me describe the encounter.

I thought the creature just seemed curious in the approach; but was surprised how quickly she not only violated all boundaries of personal space, but went from a calm demeanor to an ever-increasing tone of shrills and chatter.  Her language was peppered with all of the appropriate green words, but there was an overall indication that they were snippets that had been memorized she was merely mimicking some other creature she had seen.  She was unable to explain, expound or even truly understand the majority of the snippets that began resounding through the Jungle.

I quickly realized that it was a blaboon.  A blaboon is a creature found in the Green Jungle that makes noise almost all day (and all night) long.  Original encounters indicated poor capacity to hear, but later investigations revealed that the creature’s hearing is fine… they just don’t respond to anyone’s voice but their own.

I thought if I moved on, the creature’s attention would get diverted.  Nay, nay.  Perhaps it was my brightly-colored scarf that was continuing to pull this noisy beast along my path.  I heard, “We just have to get more laws to get all these people straightened out. We need more taxes that would pay for the green programs and green companies to get started. If we would start throwing people in jail when they refuse to stop using plastic bags, they would change their lifestyle.”  Huh?  You’re kidding right?

I seriously thought about trapping the blaboon to see if it could be rehabilitated, but quickly decided my efforts would be best put in perhaps rescuing an animal that would truly appreciate being rescued.  For those of you who do encounter a Blaboon, it is best to just keep moving.  If you dare let it know that you can hear it, it may end up following you most of the day.  It might be a lost cause to try and do a friendly escape… with the final resort of running as fast as you can with your hands over your ears.